Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
We just shotgunned beers for America
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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