I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I did not marry a roomba.
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