Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
