Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
