Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
