I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
