Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
