Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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