Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
