I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Randomize
