He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
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