I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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