Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
