Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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