"it" just moved
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
