Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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