I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Send help, water and tortillas.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize