do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
