All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
