obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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