I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize