guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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