I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
