Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
