it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
