Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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