EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
