If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
