too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
