I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
What drink are we having for lunch?
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
