Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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