i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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