I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
