Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
