Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
