At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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