I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
