just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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