the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize