Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
one might say we're banned from that church
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
He did a backflip because drugs
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