his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
try to milk me bitch
Randomize