Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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