smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
