Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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