This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Randomize
