8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
