i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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