it was like eating out sand paper
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize