if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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