i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
