and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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