do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Michael Bay diarrhea
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
